London Police

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Category: Miscellaneous

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London, United Kingdom

police.uk

London Police Reviews

baka April 7, 2009
Facts Covered Up
I've been a follower of the BBC network, and I think it's my duty as a god-fearing citizen to inform you that, after reading their news report on the death of Ian Tomlinson during the G20 protests, me and a small group of freethinkers that call ourselves "#animu" decided to discuss the topic, and we came to the conclusion that mister Tomlinson died because of the stress caused by the obscene act of masturbation he was carrying out while walking in front of the police. In fact, we suspect that he was spacing out and didn't notice the policemen yelling at him because on his mind was nothing but the most recent pornographic Japanese cartoon he had watched just minutes before leaving his home.
We were doubtful about the best way to leak this information to the public, because we know it will be a complicated issue. It's not easy to deal with those kind of people who enjoy that depraved kind of entertainment, that abortion of television that is Japanese animation.

I think things would be more clear once you read the logs of the conversation that lead to that conclusion. I hope this information serves you well and helps people getting closer to Jesus Christ, who loves mankind and gave his life to redeem our sins.

<file attached: www.christianforums.com.txt >

[21:22:25] <Lucius Magnificus> He didn't go to the protest
[21:22:30] <Lucius Magnificus> He went to work
[21:22:39] <Lucius Magnificus> He got killed on his way home
[21:22:51] <warrior_of_freedom> he got a little push
[21:23:10] <X_christian_X> MAN
[21:23:23] <X_christian_X> IT WAS LIKE A RODNEY KING THING
[21:23:41] <bishop> Except no one will care because he was elderly and white
[21:23:44] <Elohim> he probably didn't get pushed, he probably tripped
[21:23:57] <Elohim> he was old and we know old people is stupid
[21:24:32] <bishop> I thought the City of London dubbed it a heart attack fatality
[21:25:16] <X_christian_X> lol
[21:27:02] <Elohim> he couldn't withstand the pressure of being part of Outside
[21:27:13] <X_christian_X> lol
[21:27:14] <salvator> He was probably a pedophiile
[21:27:18] <X_christian_X> ELOHIM YOU'RE SO FUNNAY
[21:27:24] <Elohim> no I am not
[21:27:27] <Elohim> shut up
[21:27:36] <X_christian_X> salvator: in b4 the police file posthumous charges against him for child porn
[21:27:42] <X_christian_X> **paedophile
[21:27:46] <Elohim> he was fapping
[21:27:53] <Elohim> that's why he had his hands on his pockets
[21:27:53] <X_christian_X> to a dog?
[21:27:58] <X_christian_X> what a sickey
[21:28:03] <Elohim> to a gang of dogs
[21:28:08] <Elohim> dog harem
[21:28:14] <X_christian_X> hmm
[21:28:15] <Elohim> interspecies erotica
[21:28:17] <X_christian_X> saitoes?
[21:28:25] <X_christian_X> one is far more than enough bro
[21:28:29] <Elohim> X_christian_X: people is w-e-i-r-d
[21:28:33] <Smythe> They were probably police dogs
[21:29:12] <Elohim> he was thinking about a cute animu girl and fapping, that's why he didn't notice the police and he was walking that slow
[21:29:12] <Smythe> Interspecial sexual offense against law enforcement
[21:31:32] <salvator> He probably died after he orgasmed
[21:31:47] <warrior_of_freedom> the orgasm put too much strain on his heart
[21:31:49] <X_christian_X> He died from nutbladder holocaust
[21:32:09] <warrior_of_freedom> what a depraved slug of a man
[21:32:09] <Elohim> we should report the conclusion of our investigation to the authorities

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